My boyfriend and I broke up but I really miss him and want him back. Is there anything I can say to him to get his attention and get him back?
The end game to getting your ex boyfriend back is all about one thing: making him want you back. It doesn't matter what happened in the past and nothing is going to change until you've made your ex boyfriend start to miss you. Only when he starts to miss you and remenice about those old feelings and memories between you will he be ready and willing to get back together with you. And as someone who wants him back, it's your job to get him there.
The Most Common Mistakes Women Make:
One of the biggest mistakes that women make when trying to get back together with someone is that they engage in activities that make themselves feel better without thinking about how their ex feels. This can include things like: regularly calling him or constantly sending him texts or emails. Also, if you've ever written your ex boyfriend a love letter or bought him a card, you've inadvertantly fallen into the trap of focusing on yourself instead of him. Try doing this instead. Rather than focusing all your efforts and energies on you and the things that you think your ex boyfriend wants, try putting yourself in his shoes. Give your boyfriend a little time and space away from the drama of the breakup and let him collect his thoughts. And fighting the breakup by constantly contacting him is simply going to annoy him and make him like you less.
How To Make Him Want You Again
Contrary to what you might think, one of the most powerful ways to get your ex boyfriend interested in you again is to do nothing. This means no phone calls, emails or texts. The beautiful thing here is that the less you do now, the less you'll need to do later - and you'll see what I mean by that and how it will play out with your boyfriend below.
Typically what happens after a breakup is that someone fights for the relationship and tries to keep it alive. However, you're not going to do this. You're going to do the complete opposite and accept the breakup instead of trying to keep it alive.
What happens next is nothing short of amazing. By dropping off the map and not contacting your ex, he actually starts to think about and miss you and so he'll make up an excuse to contact you.
Let me take you into the mind of your ex boyfriend when you do this:
" Whenever I breakup with a girl the last thing I want is to hear from her all the time because I know I can have her back whenever I want.
But when I stop hearing from her I start to wonder what she's been up to and so I'll start to wonder if I made the right choice by breaking up with her.
Be prepared that he's going to do it under the guise of calling to check up on you and just see how you're doing. I guarantee that he'll be curious to know you've been up to and so he's going to call you to see what you've been doing. And when he does, you need to know what to say.
3 Tips for successfully handling your ex boyfriend's first contact after a breakup
1. Show a little excitement...but not too much. When your ex boyfriend contacts you, show a little excitment..but not too much at first. You don't want to give away your position and true intentions that you really want him back. Showing a little excitment will make you attractive in his eyes, and it's natural to want the things we can't have. So make yourself something that your ex boyfriend can't have.
2. Let him talk first. Don't jump the gun here. Let your boyfriend talk first and let him explain the reason for his phone call or visit. By letting your ex boyfriend to do most of the talking you remove the possibility of making mistakes, as well luring him into the more awkward position of making conversation. Pretty sneaky eh?
3. Secretly take control of the situation.If, during your conversation, your ex wants to casually get together, don't completely commit. Instead say something like: “Yeah, I think that is probably okay. Call me next week though, and we will see.”
Are you starting to see the big picture here? By not committing to a date but keeping the door open, you're making him call you and set the date. How cool is that!
Here's what else you've done without knowing it. Your ex fully expected that you'd be very excited to see him since you haven't spoken in so long, but you crushed his spirit by only being a little excited. As a result, you'll give him the feeling that you're not too interested in him. For all he knows, you've totally moved on from him and are interested in someone else.
Turning His World Upside Down
Ready to turn your ex boyfriend's world upside down? He's secretly worried that you're over him. He's got no idea what's going on or what to expect because you've done the opposite of what he thought you'd do. Maybe he even regrets the fact that he didn't leave the door open a crack for reconcilliation?
But guess what, you've just slammed the door in his face. You have put him out of his comfort zone, and made him realize that you're not willing to play games right now. So now your ex boyfriend has only two choices. Either he starts the process of getting you back or he risks losing you forever.
So what can you say to get your ex boyfriend back ? As little as you possibly can. Hopefully you see the value in doing nothing when it comes to getting your ex boyfriend back. Since you're not going after him he's going to be curious as to what you've been upto. And if he loves or still wants you back in the slightest he'll make the next move because the ball is now in his court.